This is how it's felt for me to have skällsord said to me. One time that kind of stands out to me is when me and my girlfriend had been having a fun day walking around window shopping and stuff and we were just happy, on eachother, together. And we were walking on to a tram and someone said "freaks..." under their breath. That didn't make me terrified to walk around with my gf outside, it didn't make me embarrassed of who I am or anything like that. It just took away some of the sun that was shining on my skin. It made my day a little more gray. You laugh at it because it's funny and odd. Odd to do and odd to experience, but yeah, it's a wet rag.
The laugh at it kind of replaces the genuine joyful laugh you were having before with a cold one, like you've ate a mint
Sometimes of course it is scary, and I think a lot of emotions go solidify under the surface where I don't necessarily notice the change. Often it's just a bit of making me more critical of people. Not as ready to smile at a stranger or notice a pretty thing as we walk. A little niggling at my brain, even if we continue on our day, holding hands. They just made an itch which I can neither scratch or ignore. Mosquitos!!! Mosquitos everywhere!!!!!!! Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
